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point in the Blow Job where I have to be careful what I say

Posted: Wed Nov 28, 2007 7:14 pm
by Skinny Bastard
Ordinarily, I am a candid, even verbose individual, but this is a particularly sensitive time for me, so I will try to remain brief. We have reached a juncture at which I, the recipient of this mind-blowing oral sex, must make some kind of statement that is both timely and appropriate. Unfortunately I am uncertain how to proceed.

[center]Image[/center]

[center]Clearly, I don't want this blow job to stop.[/center]

This is a very delicate matter. Everything has been going fantastically, and the last thing I want to do is to spoil a particularly good blow job by saying the wrong thing. But what to say? Silence is not an option, since she's likely to take that as disapproval. Or even apathy. No, it's settled. I have to say something and I have to say something soon.

It was so much easier at the beginning, when all that was required was a few moans here and there, and the occasional "ooh, yes." The protocol was clearly defined, and we were both in a comfortable spot. Now, however, even the slightest ill-timed expletive could spoil it all. Therefore, I must aspire to be more guarded, more eloquent.

I briefly considered going with "do it," but that sounds a touch derogatory, if not clichéd. She'd think that I was unoriginal or, worse yet, stupid. And who wants to fellate a dullard?

Then there's always the well-worn positive-feedback route. I could wait until she does something noteworthy, and let her know it by saying, "Oh yeah, that's it." But she actually might take that to mean the rest of it wasn't good, which is exactly the opposite of what I mean to convey. Or what if she feels like I'm giving her orders? I don't want her to think the guy she's fellating is some kind of domineering prick.

I should compliment her. Somehow. "You give nice blow jobs" seems too formal. "You suck it so good" seems too cheap. After all, this is a lady. On the other hand, perhaps she likes that kind of thing. Who am I to judge? I should have asked her before we started. For God's sake—where was your head, Mr SM?

Maybe something simple, like "You look beautiful with my penis in your mouth." No, that just seems, well, inappropriate is one word.

Why does getting sucked off have to be so complicated?

I don't know how other men do it. It seems to come so naturally for the guys in the videos. I suppose I should play off our shared interests. I could sing a few bars of that song we both like! It would be kind of a shared musical experience. Oh, who am I kidding? I can't sing, and something from Jesus Christ Superstar is vastly inappropriate for this setting.

I should have gone down on her first. That way there would be a set of mutually agreed-upon guidelines to follow.

Time is quickly becoming a factor. Any minute she could look up at me expectantly, and if that happens, I'm liable to blurt out something completely irreparable. And if I freeze and say nothing, she might become plagued with self-doubt, thinking she's done something wrong.

I could cut the tension with a joke, although I'm not very good at telling jokes, particularly when being orally serviced. Besides, I would probably lose my erection if she started laughing, and then where would I be?

I'll just touch her head. But not without asking permission first. Or not.

This could turn into an utter fiasco. I can't even count how many times perfectly good blow jobs have been ruined by a deficit of tact. I still haven't heard back from the woman to whom I unfortunately yelled, "Touchdown, Vikings!" And the time I tried out "Suck that creamsicle, suck it till it melts!" was misguided. I guess we all have our regrets.

Wait, I think I may have it: It's ribald, but not obscene, with an edge of wit. Why didn't I think of it before? It's brilliant! Oh, Mr SM, you've outdone yourself this time. Okay. It's now or never....or....

shit.... I'm afraid that point is now moot.

Re: point in the Blow Job where I have to be careful what I say

Posted: Wed Nov 28, 2007 7:32 pm
by trashtalkr
Haha this was a hilarious read! Unfortunately I really dont' have too much advice for you because I feel awkward about it too but then again I usually go down on her first

Re: point in the Blow Job where I have to be careful what I say

Posted: Wed Nov 28, 2007 8:23 pm
by Skinny Bastard
I aim to please...
...
...
ok - actually, I aim for faces... but that is another story...
;)

Re: point in the Blow Job where I have to be careful what I say

Posted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 1:17 am
by BFG9000
Okay, now can I please put my eyeballs back into my skull?

Re: point in the Blow Job where I have to be careful what I say

Posted: Tue Dec 04, 2007 4:25 pm
by Skinny Bastard
sure.... you might need them later....

Re: point in the Blow Job where I have to be careful what I say

Posted: Mon Jan 28, 2008 9:08 pm
by Skinny Bastard
bump.....

Re: point in the Blow Job where I have to be careful what I say

Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 1:12 pm
by g00b3r
Did you bump this just cause you knew I was back?? haha

I don't know how the typical female is.............but I could care less. The only thing I HATE that a guy does when being "orally serviced" is grabbing the back of my head and ramming it down onto his crotch. Now I'm going to have a sore throat because you went too hard, too fast, and your going to be crying because I just bit down on your penis.

Other than that, everything is cool. Do some shit talking if you wanna. But then again I'm the kind of girl that doesn't mind being called your, "dirty little whore". So............I'm not sure EXACTLY what to tell you.

However I never knew that guys went through as much as girls do when it comes to head.

Re: point in the Blow Job where I have to be careful what I say

Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 8:22 pm
by AYHJA
Damn, I pissed myself a bit reading this...You guys are nuts..! I must be weird, cause I don't usually give shit what's going on w/a BJ...Usually, the givee will set the pace...If I'm laying on my back and she just kinda does it, I just go w/the flow...But if she's laying on her back, with her hands around my ass pulling me into her face, well...that there just kinda flips the script...

So, so many AF'ers have issues though, lol...

Re: point in the Blow Job where I have to be careful what I say

Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 8:32 pm
by Skinny Bastard
OK - you guys didn't really take my "thought narration" seriously... did you?
OMG - CDR if you did

Re: point in the Blow Job where I have to be careful what I say

Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 11:56 pm
by Sir Jig-A-Lot
"You look beautiful with my penis in your mouth." you'd be suprised how often variations of that phrase works in your favour.