ADN

Duh … I Shot My Wife

Okay, so this guy in Texas calls 911 the other day to report that he put a cap in his bitchy wife.
“I shot my wife in the stomach with a .38,” he said in a soft and relaxed tone, as if he had called a friend to invite him over for dinner. Quite an amazing affect, actually.

The dispatcher asked the guy why he had shot his wife.

“She enticed me, and she would ridicule me throughout my lifetime.”

The operator then asked if his wife was still alive. “Hold on,” he said, “I’ll see …”

Fred Willhite, of North Richland Hills, Texas, a beat-up, old, brassy-looking guy neighbors referred to as the nutjob of the community, called 911 Monday night and told the operator his wife, Donna, was lying on the floor of their home with a .38-caliber slug in her stomach. Neighbor Curtis Simmons put Freddy boy’s life into context after the incident, telling a local TV station, “He was a nut, basically.”

As Freddy went to check on his dying wife, he could be heard in the background of the 911 tape talking to her patronizingly, asking her quite casually, “Are you alive or are you dead?” It was as if his tone implied, “Huh! I finally did it, woman!”

A moment later he returned to the phone, adding, “I think she’s dead.”

Worried Freddy was going to go on a rampage, the operator began sending several units to his home. Freddy sensed her trepidation. “I’m peaceable,” he said. “It’s OK.”

Freddy ended up surrendering peacefully when police arrived minutes later.

“He did exactly what he told the dispatcher he would do,” a police spokesman told the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. “He didn’t have a weapon or anything like that.”
Freddy wife was taken to a hospital where she later died.