Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
Men who have tattoos think they have a piece of artwork on them. Yeah, like a flaming skull is art?
Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.
Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.
Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.
All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun.
A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.
All men hate to hear "We need to talk about our relationship." These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwartzkopf.
Men are sensitive in strange ways If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
Men have an easier time buying bathing suits, Women have two types: depressing and more depressing Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.
Men have higher body temperatures than women If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.
Women take clothing much more seriously than men I've never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh no, I'm so embarrassed; I've got to get out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo."
Most men hate to shop That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.
If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.
If you're dating a man who you think might be "Mr Right," if he a) got older, /cool.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="B)" border="0" alt="cool.gif" /> got a new job, or c) visited a psychiatrist, you are in for a nasty surprise. The cocoon-to-butterfly theory only works on cocoons and butterflies.
No man is charming all of the time Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant.
When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.
When four or more women get together, they talk about men.
Men are less sentimental than women. No man has ever seen the movie THE WAY WE WERE twice, voluntarily.
Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?"
If a man says, "I'll call you," and he doesn't, he didn't forget.. he didn't lose your number.. he didn't die. He just didn't want to call you.
Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis I asked him, "Are we going to have fun again?" He said, "Maybe.. next year."
Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you.. I want to marry you.. I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave skid marks.
Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super- heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.
Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause - you get to flirt with young girls and drive motorcycles.
Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports They've already forgotten what happened.
27 facts about men compiled by a woman
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Buffmaster
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27 facts about men compiled by a woman
Big Red died 23 NOV 2001
You owe your success to your first wife. You owe your second wife to your success---Sean Connery
You owe your success to your first wife. You owe your second wife to your success---Sean Connery
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AYHJA
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Buffmaster
- Posts: 3570
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Cool, sometimes it's hard to gage what people will enjoy to read on this site.
Big Red died 23 NOV 2001
You owe your success to your first wife. You owe your second wife to your success---Sean Connery
You owe your success to your first wife. You owe your second wife to your success---Sean Connery
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WAY
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See, I know Buffmaster was a woman..! /:D" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":D" border="0" alt=":D" />
Just kidding - nice post..!
Just kidding - nice post..!
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Habib
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Lost Ghost
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Pete
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Re: 27 facts about men compiled by a woman
haha some funny shit here!
too bad suckers, I'm gonna dissect it anyway.... :devil:
Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.- fuck yeah!
Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry. can't argue with that. I just got a tetanus shot, can that be classed as pain? lol oh I never bought jewellery but I made something.
Men who have tattoos think they have a piece of artwork on them. Yeah, like a flaming skull is art?- tattoo is a form of art. Hey if you can put a triangle next to a triangle with a circle in it and make money off it, anything is art, as long as you can spout some convincing bullshit about it.
Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.- That's sexist. Women do it too, but not just to sport on the TV. "Don't go there! You're gonna get shot! Nooooo!"
Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.- Anything with a lotta blinky lights and buttons and switches makes you look impressive, 'cause it appears that you're intelligent enough to operate such a complicated looking thingy.
Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.- I don't care when I read the newspaper.
All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun. - I'm not afraid of them, but I wouldn't dare use them. My eyelashes are long enough already!
A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe. - You won't find me there. I wash me clothes myself.
All men hate to hear "We need to talk about our relationship." These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwartzkopf. - Correction- Just "We need to talk" are the four words that strike fear into the heart of even this bloke called General Schwartzkopf!
Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
Men have an easier time buying bathing suits, Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.
Men have higher body temperatures than women If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. I only recommend that for a specific case, when that man is me /wink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=";)" border="0" alt="wink.gif" />
Men are like portable heaters that snore.- I've only snored about 6 times in my entire life.
Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh no, I'm so embarrassed; I've got to get out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo." That's 'cause women want to stand out from each other, they are competing with one another to attract attention. I personally hate tuxedos, so although I hate shopping for clothes, I also don't wanna look like everyone else.
Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.- That's a bit general. I hate to shop, but I LOVE to shop for food! And strangely, I find it oddly exciting shopping for stationery.......
If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.- I guess so. Unless I suppose they were a rabbit in a past life.
If you're dating a man who you think might be "Mr Right," if he a) got older, /cool.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="B)" border="0" alt="cool.gif" /> got a new job, or c) visited a psychiatrist, you are in for a nasty surprise. The cocoon-to-butterfly theory only works on cocoons and butterflies. - It's happened to swans! 'ey!
No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant. - No lady is beautiful all of the time either. Get on with it and everything will be rosy.
When four or more men get together, they talk about sports. - I don't. I like to play sports and see a game live, but personally I don't care much for it. That's a blatant stereotype. (wow I'm gettin' serious here! lol)
When four or more women get together, they talk about men. - fair enough.....
Men are less sentimental than women. No man has ever seen the movie THE WAY WE WERE twice, voluntarily.- I haven't even heard of that movie.
Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?" Key word is most, not all.
If a man says, "I'll call you," and he doesn't, he didn't forget.. he didn't lose your number.. he didn't die. He just didn't want to call you. - MAYBE THE PHONE NETWORK WAS OUT OF SERVICE? (sorry that pissed me off)
Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis I asked him, "Are we going to have fun again?" He said, "Maybe.. next year." - I feel gutted like a chainsaw in me stomach when I lose something......
Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you.. I want to marry you.. I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave skid marks. That wouldn't get rid of me.
Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super- heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie. That's due to a negative train of thought, in the wrong direction.
Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause - you get to flirt with young girls and drive motorcycles. - some also get nervous breakdowns, as well as fat.
Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports They've already forgotten what happened.- No. There are instant replays because they like seeing it again and again and again 'cause it looks cool! Even on the Iron Chef, they do replays of whenever Chen Kenichi gets the flames going from his wok!
Oh, I know men who remember EVERYTHING, so again that's a gross biased sexist generalisation.
too bad suckers, I'm gonna dissect it anyway.... :devil:
Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.- fuck yeah!
Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry. can't argue with that. I just got a tetanus shot, can that be classed as pain? lol oh I never bought jewellery but I made something.
Men who have tattoos think they have a piece of artwork on them. Yeah, like a flaming skull is art?- tattoo is a form of art. Hey if you can put a triangle next to a triangle with a circle in it and make money off it, anything is art, as long as you can spout some convincing bullshit about it.
Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.- That's sexist. Women do it too, but not just to sport on the TV. "Don't go there! You're gonna get shot! Nooooo!"
Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.- Anything with a lotta blinky lights and buttons and switches makes you look impressive, 'cause it appears that you're intelligent enough to operate such a complicated looking thingy.
Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.- I don't care when I read the newspaper.
All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun. - I'm not afraid of them, but I wouldn't dare use them. My eyelashes are long enough already!
A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe. - You won't find me there. I wash me clothes myself.
All men hate to hear "We need to talk about our relationship." These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwartzkopf. - Correction- Just "We need to talk" are the four words that strike fear into the heart of even this bloke called General Schwartzkopf!
Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
Men have an easier time buying bathing suits, Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.
Men have higher body temperatures than women If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. I only recommend that for a specific case, when that man is me /wink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=";)" border="0" alt="wink.gif" />
Men are like portable heaters that snore.- I've only snored about 6 times in my entire life.
Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh no, I'm so embarrassed; I've got to get out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo." That's 'cause women want to stand out from each other, they are competing with one another to attract attention. I personally hate tuxedos, so although I hate shopping for clothes, I also don't wanna look like everyone else.
Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.- That's a bit general. I hate to shop, but I LOVE to shop for food! And strangely, I find it oddly exciting shopping for stationery.......
If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.- I guess so. Unless I suppose they were a rabbit in a past life.
If you're dating a man who you think might be "Mr Right," if he a) got older, /cool.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="B)" border="0" alt="cool.gif" /> got a new job, or c) visited a psychiatrist, you are in for a nasty surprise. The cocoon-to-butterfly theory only works on cocoons and butterflies. - It's happened to swans! 'ey!
No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant. - No lady is beautiful all of the time either. Get on with it and everything will be rosy.
When four or more men get together, they talk about sports. - I don't. I like to play sports and see a game live, but personally I don't care much for it. That's a blatant stereotype. (wow I'm gettin' serious here! lol)
When four or more women get together, they talk about men. - fair enough.....
Men are less sentimental than women. No man has ever seen the movie THE WAY WE WERE twice, voluntarily.- I haven't even heard of that movie.
Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?" Key word is most, not all.
If a man says, "I'll call you," and he doesn't, he didn't forget.. he didn't lose your number.. he didn't die. He just didn't want to call you. - MAYBE THE PHONE NETWORK WAS OUT OF SERVICE? (sorry that pissed me off)
Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis I asked him, "Are we going to have fun again?" He said, "Maybe.. next year." - I feel gutted like a chainsaw in me stomach when I lose something......
Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you.. I want to marry you.. I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave skid marks. That wouldn't get rid of me.
Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super- heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie. That's due to a negative train of thought, in the wrong direction.
Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause - you get to flirt with young girls and drive motorcycles. - some also get nervous breakdowns, as well as fat.
Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports They've already forgotten what happened.- No. There are instant replays because they like seeing it again and again and again 'cause it looks cool! Even on the Iron Chef, they do replays of whenever Chen Kenichi gets the flames going from his wok!
Oh, I know men who remember EVERYTHING, so again that's a gross biased sexist generalisation.
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CS
- Posts: 236
- Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 7:42 pm
Great stuff m8, let me have a go...
Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
We†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢ll hunt the fuckers down and kill †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¹¦¢‚¬Å“em too, just so our women can clean †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¹¦¢‚¬Å“em while we watch sports.
Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
And are most likely advocates for same sex marriage.
Men who have tattoos think they have a piece of artwork on them. Yeah, like a flaming skull is art?
About as much as a unicorn, a shooting star, the word †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¦¢¢¬…œpri
ncess†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬?, and BUTTERFLIES.
Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.
Bitch we know you†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢re ordering more useless cubic zirconias off QVC...
Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.
Makes drunk dialing a lot easier in the dark.
Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.
Not true, we like being the second to cum so your ass won†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢t complain.
All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun.
We†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢re also afraid of commitment, which is why we fuck your friends.
A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaners. These men usually have jobs and bathe.
And are most likely advocates for same sex marriage.
All men hate to hear "We need to talk about our relationship." These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwartzkopf.
You look fat in those pants.
Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
Fire good, beer good.....need meat, two tits, hole, heartbeat......sleep.
Men have an easier time buying bathing suits, Women have two types: depressing and more depressing Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.
Don†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢t forget faggot speedo and the †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¦¢¢¬…œple
ase kick me in the balls†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬? banana hammock.
Men have higher body temperatures than women If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.
Two words honey, †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¦¢¢¬…œdut
ch oven†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬?
Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh no, I'm so embarrassed; I've got to get out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo."
Men take electronics more seriously than women. I've never seen a woman walk into a party and say "Look at the plasma screen TV! Bitch... Baby, we gotta go to Best Buy NOW!"
Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.
Try taking us gun shopping...
If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.
And is most likely an advocate for same sex marriage.
If you're dating a man who you think might be "Mr Right," if he a) got older, /cool.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="B)" border="0" alt="cool.gif" /> got a new job, or c) visited a psychiatrist, you are in for a nasty surprise. The cocoon-to-butterfly theory only works on cocoons and butterflies.
You can also verify this theory by checking to see if he has a penis and testicles.
No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant.
Wasn†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢t he an advocate for same sex marriage?
When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.
Unless women aren†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢t around, then we talk about boobs.
When four or more women get together, they talk about men.
Uh, okay, I†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢d rather imagine you comparing breast sizes...
Men are less sentimental than women. No man has ever seen the movie THE WAY WE WERE twice, voluntarily.
No man has ever seen it at all. Sure men might have been in the room, but we were looking down your shirt.
Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?"
The only introspective you†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢ll get out of us is †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¦¢¢¬…œHow
can I my pecker intro her rectum?†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬?
If a man says, "I'll call you," and he doesn't, he didn't forget.. he didn't lose your number.. he didn't die. He just didn't want to call you.
Actually we mean that, but since we forgot your name, we probably called someone with bigger tits.
Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis I asked him, "Are we going to have fun again?" He said, "Maybe.. next year."
It was TENNIS!
Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you.. I want to marry you.. I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave skid marks.
Marks that end at a titty bar...
Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super- heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.
Oh the things my Superman figure did to my sister†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢s Barbie dolls. Yeah, that†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢s right, plural, †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¦¢¢¬…œdol
lS†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬?
Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause - you get to flirt with young girls and drive motorcycles.
Men did not invent male menopause. We invented, †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¦¢¢¬…œGet
ting your game on since your wife has become a walking erection killer.†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬?
Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports They've already forgotten what happened.
Stats baby, fuck the 3 month anniversary of our first kiss, ask us about some stats.
Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
We†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢ll hunt the fuckers down and kill †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¹¦¢‚¬Å“em too, just so our women can clean †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¹¦¢‚¬Å“em while we watch sports.
Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
And are most likely advocates for same sex marriage.
Men who have tattoos think they have a piece of artwork on them. Yeah, like a flaming skull is art?
About as much as a unicorn, a shooting star, the word †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¦¢¢¬…œpri
ncess†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬?, and BUTTERFLIES.
Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.
Bitch we know you†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢re ordering more useless cubic zirconias off QVC...
Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.
Makes drunk dialing a lot easier in the dark.
Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.
Not true, we like being the second to cum so your ass won†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢t complain.
All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun.
We†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢re also afraid of commitment, which is why we fuck your friends.
A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaners. These men usually have jobs and bathe.
And are most likely advocates for same sex marriage.
All men hate to hear "We need to talk about our relationship." These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwartzkopf.
You look fat in those pants.
Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
Fire good, beer good.....need meat, two tits, hole, heartbeat......sleep.
Men have an easier time buying bathing suits, Women have two types: depressing and more depressing Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.
Don†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢t forget faggot speedo and the †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¦¢¢¬…œple
ase kick me in the balls†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬? banana hammock.
Men have higher body temperatures than women If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.
Two words honey, †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¦¢¢¬…œdut
ch oven†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬?
Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh no, I'm so embarrassed; I've got to get out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo."
Men take electronics more seriously than women. I've never seen a woman walk into a party and say "Look at the plasma screen TV! Bitch... Baby, we gotta go to Best Buy NOW!"
Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.
Try taking us gun shopping...
If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.
And is most likely an advocate for same sex marriage.
If you're dating a man who you think might be "Mr Right," if he a) got older, /cool.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="B)" border="0" alt="cool.gif" /> got a new job, or c) visited a psychiatrist, you are in for a nasty surprise. The cocoon-to-butterfly theory only works on cocoons and butterflies.
You can also verify this theory by checking to see if he has a penis and testicles.
No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant.
Wasn†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢t he an advocate for same sex marriage?
When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.
Unless women aren†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢t around, then we talk about boobs.
When four or more women get together, they talk about men.
Uh, okay, I†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢d rather imagine you comparing breast sizes...
Men are less sentimental than women. No man has ever seen the movie THE WAY WE WERE twice, voluntarily.
No man has ever seen it at all. Sure men might have been in the room, but we were looking down your shirt.
Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?"
The only introspective you†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢ll get out of us is †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¦¢¢¬…œHow
can I my pecker intro her rectum?†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬?
If a man says, "I'll call you," and he doesn't, he didn't forget.. he didn't lose your number.. he didn't die. He just didn't want to call you.
Actually we mean that, but since we forgot your name, we probably called someone with bigger tits.
Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis I asked him, "Are we going to have fun again?" He said, "Maybe.. next year."
It was TENNIS!
Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you.. I want to marry you.. I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave skid marks.
Marks that end at a titty bar...
Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super- heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.
Oh the things my Superman figure did to my sister†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢s Barbie dolls. Yeah, that†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾
‚¢s right, plural, †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¦¢¢¬…œdol
lS†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬?
Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause - you get to flirt with young girls and drive motorcycles.
Men did not invent male menopause. We invented, †™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬¢‚¬¦¢¢¬…œGet
ting your game on since your wife has become a walking erection killer.†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬?
Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports They've already forgotten what happened.
Stats baby, fuck the 3 month anniversary of our first kiss, ask us about some stats.
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