Dark, Deranged, Demented- what is it that mystifies me?

#1

Here, let me clarify it a bit more.

I have this wierd fascination for dark, spooky places......I say deranged & demented, because I'm curious about lunatic asylums...... :shock:

Old spooky prisons, especially forensic hospitals. Ancient secret passages in old buildings that lead out to moors.....

Here, let me describe a thought that's existed in my head for a LONG time...

I remember playing about at the back of my godfather's tuckshop (fish & chips, hamburgers, sandwiches, a lunch bar). It was in a small shopping complex on the main road (cnr Ingham Road & Percy Street to be precise) in an industrial district, across the road is the railway line. The (old) main way into Townsville. His shop was next to a butcher shop (with a statue cow on top), a laundromat, and a bottle shop and some other things.

Anyway, the back door of his shop led to a small dark passageway. It looked like the prison corridor in the Baltimore State Forensic Hospital for the Criminally Insane out of Silence of the Lambs. It was grey cement bricks & pipes and DARK. Very gloomy. Along the corridor was a left corner (to probably the back door of another shop), and I was always curious but scared to walk past that corner. But what really spooked me was the door on the other side from my godfather's shop. It opened to a room that wasn't being used. I remember seeing into it and it was really white and bleak in there.... There was this white hard table in the middle. For some odd reason, at the tender age of six, looking into that room across a dark spooky corridor, I visualised a sheep being slaughtered on that table.........................

I've ALWAYS been spooked by curious and mystified by that room and that corridor.

Also, growing up I enjoyed watching The Famous Five- the tv adaptation of Enid Blyton's classic series of 5 kids and their dog riding around the English countryside and getting into lots of adventures. It had ALOT of spooky secret passages....

And it's strange, as it ties in with my curiosity with lunatic asylums. I don't know why, but although I feel a little spooked by them, I'm curious about them.

Even that Baltimore Forensic Hospital for the Criminally Insane- I am MORE frightened by the hospital itself, and watching Clarice Starling walk the twists and turns and stairs and dark passageways and gates and sealed doors, to Hannibal "The Cannibal" Lecter's glass-encased cell, than I am of Hannibal himself. The same for Jame Gumb's underworld, those dark creepy rooms and passageways, than what he has on that sewing machine...............

I don't understand why I have this morbid fascination. WHY???

Why am I freaked out but curious about mental institutions?

What is it?

Dig deep. Pull out all the psychoanalytical tools you have. Stick me under the microscope. I want to get to the bottom of this.

Even this freaks me out and yet fascinates me. It's the local forensic hospital for the criminally insane, and...barely 500 metres from my own home.....

#2

Researchers say it's actually the adrenaline rush and the wave of relief once the fright is over that makes being scared so much fun. I remember a professor saying the euphoria people feel when the credits roll or they finally leave a house of horrors is what keeps them coming back, even if they absolutely hated the experience.

People come away from these movies oftentimes feeling really happy and relieved that the horror is over. They remember that they felt good and so they say, 'Oh yeah, I like scary movies.' But it's not that they really like being scared. They just felt good afterward. It is the natural adrenaline-induced high often lingers long enough to supplant moviegoers' memories of cringing in their seats with a favorable recollection of the experience.

People love being scared because of the body†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾

‚¢s chemical reaction to it. The effects of such reactions can last much longer than a drug and the memories will be there forever.

#3

Honestly..?

I bet you were a serial killer in a past life...And I don't mean that in a bad or joking way...Either you were exposed to something traumatic as a child and have blacked it out, or you are being visited on a regular by a part of you that wasn't none to friendly...

I LOVE studying the mind...Its what I do in my spare time...I read about serial killers and disturbed peeps all the time...And while it may lead a person to thing most guys are obviously crazy, most of them are not...A case study I posted on this very forum that is probably buried here, describes men doing horrible acts, that were otherwise upstanding, hardworking, or intelligent people...They, for unknown reasons, simply couldn't resist that darkness within them...My belief on behavior is reactive based relativity...

Your fascination of dark spooky places, I would also say is related to your having never really lost it, but coming close so many times...You say that you get really angry at times...Tact...Order...Tendency towards static obsessions and fetishes...

And had I read this, and not known who you were, I would have said you were one simple stimulus away from committing a heinous crime or being the next backpack killer...

I'd start the therapy w/discussing your rage, and working from that point on....

#4

What about normal sane people that just loved to be scared? The adrenaline rush factor is what makes people ride roller coasters and sky dive many times. I don't know anyone who rides the coasters for any other reason.

I think some people just like to be scared because it provides them the thrill of something different than the normal, everyday feelings we have day in and day out. Why do people cheat on their spouse? Why do people go paintballing? Why do people do xtreme sports? For the thrill of it. I think it is the same with being scared. People love to be afraid of what they do not know. What they cannot see is often what drives them to move forward.

#5

ruff, I think you missed the key thing, stated by Pete himself...

morbid fascination

He didn't say thrill seeking...Riding coasters and bunjee jumping and shit...He said, "I have this wierd fascination for dark, spooky places" which lets me know, he understands thrill seeking, and moves this as something else...I have known Pete for a while, he's scary intelligent and a good guy...But he has his moments that makes me suggest the things I have...I know for sure you weren't around for them, so seeing as that you don't know Pete that well, and not really a student of psychology, remind me of why it is you're here..?

#6

What I was talking about is the rush factor. He probably likes dark and morbid places because it brings him as close to death as he wants to be. The RUSH of being somewhere that scares most other people to be is inviting to people who have an infatuation with death. That†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾

‚¢s to what I was referring.

#7

ruff, that is a text book suggestion...

but those of us who have seen a little into the darkness that Pete himself is looking at knows it is abit more than that. He is by far not the only person I know with homocidal tendancies, but he is one of the rare ones who has personalized them, in an attempt to understand them. this lead to a severing of the base desires associated with the pineal and pituitary bodies. that is characterist of neurotic mentality.

we call that "section 8, typical A"

Also Pete is a good friend of many of us, myself included. I was pumping my fist for Pete when most people wanted him banned, and I knew it would pay off. Ayhja was right there on his side as well.

He is a great guy, but his shadow is not as innocent as the darkness of the tunnel on the rollercoaster barrel roll. We all have our demons, but few warrant a network profile for Hell's Administrators. and if Pete were not as uncommonly strong as he is, his would.

That shadow is unconcerned with causing death as much as it is so concerned with suffering, that it would be so severe that death could be the only possible conclusion... but their would be no satisfaction in causing that death.,.. it would be a disappointing event that would be the catalyst to prompt the next victim's fate. he could easily be the composer of some horrific murderous ballads were he not as strong as he is, and had not found a vicarious interest in geology. the rock feels nothing, the stone can be crushed and it is still stone...

always looking for the one that could immortally bear the full depravity of its dark imaginings. he would have a certain "detatched amusement" to it that would be reminescent of the doctors who imposed forced sterility on young Jewish maidens just to see if they would commit suicide.

I would actually go so far as to suggest Pete has a certain inert neurosis involving a repression that fragmented his psyche at a very young age, or possibly originating before his own current consciousness developed. It appears to him as animals, usually in sacrificial scenes that have a strong biblical element that he seems to be almost completely ignorant of.

And in silence it bears down on him,.. filling the void... it whipers and whimpers. he is scared of the corridor that leads to the killer's lair, and the lunatic's cell because as he walks to that that door, the voice teases "it could be you on the other side of that door, if you but let me have the freedom I seek." because his darkness has found a victim to torture, and it is "Pete" himself. and Pete bears that burden himself so his darkness remains appeased. and the only time it really overbears his tolerance of it, is when ambience prevades, or rage surges.

and he seeks solace from it in dark music, metal and such,.. because somehow by hearing it, it shows him that it IS O.K. to have a shadow, i'ts a form of acceptance, if you will. by emulating it, he has developed an advantage of it.

and I firmly believe that he was lucky to have been born in the much more blunt and rustic Australia than in "more civilized" cultures.

but regardless, if (*god forbid*) Pete were to suffer a severe mental trauma to the right side of his skull, I would throw money on him developing an interest in taxidermy and photography that would ultimately in in human subjects by time he was in his mid fifties. and he would be puzzled by the notion he would be expected to feel remorse.

#8

Well, I'm a text book kind of guy. I have been around people like Pete my entire military career. I mean you have to be a little off to ASK to go special ops.

Anyone that is drawn to dark places and being alone is going to be a person that, like AYHJA said, probably had some trauma happen in the past that they are unwilling to, or unable to, admit. I don't know Pete from John, but I know that going to dark alleys for no real reason isn't a healthy adventure. Anyone who does such things really and truly needs to seek some help from a qualified individual. They very well could be on the verge of "snapping" and going postal on alot of people. Maybe he just hurts himself, but, I would rather see him deal with his issues and concerns rather than killing himself or other people.

#9

QUOTE(ruffriders23)What I was talking about is the rush factor. He probably likes dark and morbid places because it brings him as close to death as he wants to be. The RUSH of being somewhere that scares most other people to be is inviting to people who have an infatuation with death. That†™‚¢‚¢¢¢¬…¡‚¬‚¢¢¢¬…¾

‚¢s to what I was referring.

That could be a plausible explanation.

But the thing is, I HATE being scared. I absolutely hate being frightened. I do enjoy challenges, so if I was in the military I would accept some of the more wierder and exotic operations.

The thing with this, is that although I am terrified, I am also strangely curious.

As AYHJA highlighted- it's a morbid fascination...........

#10

QUOTE(AYHJA)Honestly..?

I bet you were a serial killer in a past life...And I don't mean that in a bad or joking way...Either you were exposed to something traumatic as a child and have blacked it out, or you are being visited on a regular by a part of you that wasn't none to friendly...

I LOVE studying the mind...Its what I do in my spare time...I read about serial killers and disturbed peeps all the time...And while it may lead a person to thing most guys are obviously crazy, most of them are not...A case study I posted on this very forum that is probably buried here, describes men doing horrible acts, that were otherwise upstanding, hardworking, or intelligent people...They, for unknown reasons, simply couldn't resist that darkness within them...My belief on behavior is reactive based relativity...

Your fascination of dark spooky places, I would also say is related to your having never really lost it, but coming close so many times...You say that you get really angry at times...Tact...Order...Tendency towards static obsessions and fetishes...

And had I read this, and not known who you were, I would have said you were one simple stimulus away from committing a heinous crime or being the next backpack killer...

I'd start the therapy w/discussing your rage, and working from that point on....

I guess that there are some things that are still blacked out in my mind. That's why I wrote this thread, for you all to help probe it out.

I'm not offended by your suggestion that I may have been a serial killer in a past life. Even though you say that, if you didn't know me, I very likely could commit a serious murder within the next day.........

'cause I do have an interest in how and what serial killers do. Just recently there was an article in the newspaper about a recent serial killer. Well, the article was an excerpt into the court case and revealing statements of the serial killer- he flatly admitted he was guilty of charge right at the beginning of the court case, and since it was being broadcast on television, the judge made the serial killer explain every detail of his memory of his crimes, so everyone could learn the mind of a serial killer. I wanna get that book.

Looking through the documentaries of Silence of the Lambs (bonus bits on the DVD, great stuff, they run almost the length of the film), I was amazed to find out that there really was a serial killer who locked his victims in his basement, putting them down there through a hole in the floor. I was like "I wanna see the basement!" even though I was absolutely shocked at the crimes.

I just don't get why my imagination can get so dark, and be so fascinated by the dark....