Growing pains

#1

Its taken me a very long time to figure out clearing and precisely what I want to do with my life and my kids. My son was recently born on the 13th. I lost my job two weeks prior of him being born. At first I was stressed out, hell to be honest I still am because I still haven†™ ¢‚¬„¢¢‚¬Å¡‚¢†™‚¢‚¢¢¢‚¬Å¡‚¬¦‚¡¢‚¬Å¡‚¬†™‚¢‚¢¢¢‚¬Å¡‚¬¦‚¾¢‚¬Å¡‚¢t received my first unemployment check yet. But in losing my job and not dealing with the bullshit from work I was able to slow down and really evaluate my life and its direction. But the best part about it is I am having dreams again and I am starting to hear again. It†™ ¢‚¬„¢¢‚¬Å¡‚¢†™‚¢‚¢¢¢‚¬Å¡‚¬¦‚¡¢‚¬Å¡‚¬†™‚¢‚¢¢¢‚¬Å¡‚¬¦‚¾¢‚¬Å¡‚¢s taken me three and a half years to really see how I was fucking up my life and how I lost control of my life by focusing on me instead of the important ones around me. For the first time in my life I actually have a life plan that I hope gets blessed by the almighty, but it even feels good just having a plan. Up until my son being born my life had no direction. I went through what I went through for a reason and I do know why I did. Do you know why you go through the things you do?

#2

First off, congratulations on your Son being born...Being the father of a son myself, I totally understand your joys and your pains...It becomes a different ballgame for a conscious man who grew up without a father, look into the eyes of his son and wonder if he is ever capable of doing such a thing...

My path, has been to simplify, and break things down to a level that is essential to survival...As it turns out, life is not that hard..! Spend time working with the ones you love, and suddenly, working against them seems frivilous and petty...You know me well, you know that I'm not just talking out of my ass, it wasn't a year ago this time that I was faced with the same predicament...And when it came time, no decision would be more clear...I would do whatever it takes to make my family happy...I want ALL the pressure, I want to be the one that they look to when there is no other hope...I want for the simple fact of me saying that its going to be alright will be all they need...

The other day, me and Ra were walking outside at night, and he said to me that he was afraid...And I stopped, looked down into his face, and told him that as long as I was around, he would never have a reason to fear anything...And he looked at me, and said, "OK" and he walked with his head up the rest of the way...And he wasn't scared anymore either...

Me and my S.O. have had our ups and downs, but in her eyes, I had to earn the right to be her man...And rather than twist that into something else, I stand up to meet that challenge cause that's what men do...As far as I'm concerned, if I had to carry this family on my back, cook, clean, pay the bills, the whole nine, then that's what I'm going to do...

You go through your struggles to be able to do that...

Get "vertical" with yourself, and who you are...And be everything your family needs you to be...Meditate, focus, get your strength from God and give it to your wife and children...You blessed and don't even know it, taking it for granted...

How many of your friends, or just people you hang out with have a good woman by their side, and two beautiful, healthy children of their own..? That's a lovely thing little brother, please believe it..!

You're gonna be alright...You gonna be alright....

#3

Congrats on your son! I am not yet a father, but I do intend to become one eventually.

#4

and make sure you tell him every chance you get, "Look both ways before crossing the street!"