What's the worst breakup excuse you've ever used..?

#1

When it was time to call it quits, what are some of the things you've said and or been told to end the relationship..?

#2

The best of all time goes to my friend Joel...he didn't know how to break up with a girl he didn't like anymore (this is in 8th grade)...so at a skating event he breaks the news to her by justifying the breakup with..."Well...You're kinda gettin' fat"

LMMFAOx10000000000

poor bitch has prolly been anorexic from that day on. dayum!

#3

Let's see... breakup with 1st wife: "I don't appreciate the fact that you've slept with my best friend. We're done."

2nd wife: "I don't appreciate the fact that you're psycho. We're done."

#4

My ex-boyfriend and I had a long distance relationship for nine months or so; I lived in Illinois and he went to a military school in Wisconsin. Then I moved about a half hour away from my house in Illinois, and he came back to live with his parents (who lived about twenty minutes away from my new house) for the summer. Despite the fact that we had made it work when he came home on special weekends and holidays, as soon as I moved I said that "It's going to be really hard to see eachother now, I think we should break up- long distance stuff isn't something I think we should be getting into." Bogus excuse? Yes. Do I regret it? Hell no! lol.

#5

I've never broken up with a gf as such. The closest thing was one girl I was starting to go out with. I was not very enthusiastic and she noticed and asked me something in the lines of "is it not working?" and I just told her the truth. Otherwise I was mostly at the receiving end.

Lost Ghost · #6

QUOTE(deepdiver32073)Let's see... breakup with 1st wife: \"I don't appreciate the fact that you've slept with my best friend. We're done.\"

2nd wife: \"I don't appreciate the fact that you're psycho. We're done.\"

none of that was followed by a "SO YOU BOUT TO DIE BITCH!" ::breaks chair over head:: or nothing!??!?!

Damn DD.....I need to take you through a class on how to really get your point across lmao..

#7

Damn, never EVER is it always so clean cut for me...Luckily, for most of my serious relationships, inevitable distance pretty much made things easy for me...When you see each other every so often, and nobody is talking about moving, you really don't have to say much...

And in college, I just laid my shit out quite flat, women seem to be more receptive to "I'm not really looking for a relationship, but we can kick it," than frontin' and then breaking her heart...I'm a momma's boy, so its not in my nature to be hard on chicks...But MAAAAAN the darkside of the force runs strong on my father's side of the family...Shit could have been much more vicious than it was...

And ROTFL @ Aemeth..!!! Man that's some killer shit to say to a woman, regardless of age...

#8

By any chance, did he look like this..?

#9

QUOTE(Lost Ghost)QUOTE(deepdiver32073)Let's see... breakup with 1st wife: \"I don't appreciate the fact that you've slept with my best friend. We're done.\"

2nd wife: \"I don't appreciate the fact that you're psycho. We're done.\"

none of that was followed by a \"SO YOU BOUT TO DIE BITCH!\" ::breaks chair over head:: or nothing!??!?!

Damn DD.....I need to take you through a class on how to really get your point across lmao..

Well, with my first wife, when I found out, she was at work and (former) best friend was on a trip. I had my Browning Hi-Power out, cleaned, loaded with Corbon hollow-points, just waiting for her ass to come home. Fortunately, it gave me time to get over my rage and get analytical about the situation. Obviously, it was over, but killing her would only put my ass in jail and my kids in an orphanage.

With 2nd wife, I come home from work and the bitch has that same gun pointing at me as I walk thru the door, screaming at me about some affair I hadn't had. I walked right up to her, took the gun away from her (slide locked back, no magazine... otherwise I'd have made fast tracks!). I told her that she was beginning to scare the hell out of me, that I wasn't her ex, but that I wasn't going to put up with that shit anymore. 2 days later she moved out.